


Guilt of the Living

by vogue91



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Drabble Collection, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-20
Updated: 2017-12-20
Packaged: 2019-02-17 11:27:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13075899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vogue91/pseuds/vogue91
Summary: Being the Chosen One and all, Harry still couldn't help but feel as if all that had happened had been his fault.





	Guilt of the Living

**_A life for a life_ **

Death isn’t always the same.

You can abandon yourself to destiny, or you can fight against it. And lose.

And know you realize how hard your parents fought, for the wrong reason, and your head seems to burst, full of voices and pictures that you’d like to freeze out, but that keep harassing you instead.

Your mother, in front of you, that begs and prays just to save your life, without thinking about her own.

Her tears, poorly hidden behind a veil of pride, tell you that your father has already met his fate, and that the same is about to happen to her.

_And it is your fault._

**_Without time nor cause_ **

There’s no battle.

There’s no explanation, no tears, no defence.

Just death, come too soon and too senseless.

You stare long at the thing in front of you, little more than a larva, and hatred reigns in your mind, making the fury you feel blind.

You hate him, you hate his despise for human life and all it stands for, you hate the way a boy’s existence ha just been broken off, just because he was in the worst place possible.

Just because he was with you.

Because you hate Voldemort, but inside you know that, in the end, _it’s your fault._

**_Silent death_ **

There’s something delicate in this last passing.

One can die falling on the floor, with a deafening sound as a witness of what just happened.

And once can die laying back, letting alive the disappointed hope that it hasn’t actually happened.

That’s how Sirius went.

You kneel, you scream, you give a voice to that silent death, which is impossible for you to believe.

You cry and you despair, you’d want to run but someone stops you.

There’s nothing you can do but paying for your mistakes, for your impulsiveness that tonight has turned lethal.

Because you loved him, but his death it’s _all your fault._

**_The smell of the end_ **

A child is going to be fatherless and motherless, just like you.

A mother and a father aren’t going to have a son anymore.

Too much pain.

It crawls the castle’s walls, it soaks the air with an unbearable smell of dead flesh.

Dead, because of a madman who mocks death itself and because of you, who of death has seen too much.

You’re condemned to watch lives breaking instead of yours, without the courage of doing something.

Or to admit that it’s _your damn fault._

**_Guilt of the living_ **

Ended.

It’s ended.

The sun has risen, and scarce smiles start to appear on the survivors’ faces.

The world cheers a new dawn, knowing that death it’s far.

You’d want to smile too, you’d want to scream out of joy, starting to life that existence that you’ve been denied up until now.

But you can’t.

Now you can live, while too many have lost the chance to.

Now you can breathe, but inside of you there’s a weigh too heavy to be ignored.

Death has fled, as well as Voldemort.

And it has found its place inside of you, and you’ll never be free of this burden.

The burden of a fault that, you know it, it’s all yours.   


End file.
